Lying.

Ever had someone lie to your face with you knowing that they lie? When this happens, I trusts the urge to throw the nearest and most dangerous object into their face. But for some reason, I win, and I finish up building my “case”.

She lied to me – several times – as I sat there listening. She still is.

Just when I started to feel a tiny bit better, lies flow in.

Does she really think I’m dumb? Stupid? Or simply too kind? So far, I haven’t even confronted her with me knowing that she’s said anything but the fucking truth to me.

I’m a reasonable man. But I do have a lot of self respect. Though a certain issue (I’m still discovering how disgusting and big it is) is closed – to her -, my new issue is lying – which I will not tolerate.

I stand by my word of not digging anymore as long as what I hear from her is the ultimate truth. But if new stuff is discovered, floats from the past, and given the chance was not mentioned, that will be a moment of serious dealing.

Imagine, just imagine, a loved one taking you for granted – lying to your face, no matter the reason. True love means sharing your sins as they were mostly uncovered. But toning it down, insisting on lying and covering up .. results in doubts.

I don’t think of suicide not I ever will. But I sure wish death right now. I wish death much more than I wanted to get married.

At least I die, sadly, alone, be gone of pathetic lies to my face. People will be hurt, but that is the way of life.

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